So with the dimensional marauder off to his own plane of existence to attempt to deliver a message to Olden the remaining party members, and former-mayor Mordred, untied the female prisoner they had won from the battle. She claimed to be a nurse and had been left behind when the townsfolk ran away. Luckily, she also claimed to know where the townsfolk had headed, and they decided to escort her safely there, ‘cos that’s how they roll. They risk their lives for a whole town and intend on saving their companion (“friend” would be too strong a word – in fact, it took quite some discussion to even bother going after him) without any hope of a thanks or reward…
Not two steps out of the gate (and only two lines into their first showtune) they were ambushed by a gang of wil’o’wisps and some bats on fire (I’m not shitting you, the bats WERE ON FIRE!). Birdseye’s first impulse when he saw the wisps was to shout “OH MY GOD! THREE MOTORBIKES COMING RIGHT AT US!!” but before he managed to get the words out, or dive out of the way, it occurred to him that motorbikes wouldn’t have their lights on in the middle of the day. They weren’t motorbikes! Plus… he didn’t know what a motorbike was. He made a mental note to google it later. This last thought left him standing there, puzzled, and caused him to come out low down on the initiative order.
Leia at first attempted to talk her way out of a fight and through her discussion with the wisps she learned that:
1) They are drawn to anguish and dismay, which is what brought them to the town. They had actually set off before the town was attacked – the night before the attack someone was watching the TV show “Heroes”.
2) Neither the wisps nor the bats had any loot!
The lack of loot caused some dismay and anguish to the adventurers (which drew the wisps even closer), who considered running off without a fight, but feck it… it’d be FUN! So they dived in.
The sight of Arjhan giving one of the wisps a jolly good slap caused a flashback in Birdseye’s mind: when he was a teenager, getting out of the bath, he glimpsed the reflection of a candle in his left ball. “SHIT! SHIT! SHIT!!” he screamed as he started to punch what he thought was a wil’o’wisp, “A WIL’O’WISP!!!” It took close to an hour for the candle to burn out, at which point Birdseye thought he had killed the wisp. And that, boys and girls, is why Birdseye has only got one ball. He calls it Ed.
During the fight many a cut and bruise was sustained by the adventurers and yet… the NURSE stood there and did nothing (so did Sonlin as his powers are fire-based…).
Just as the adventurers had the upper hand in the battle there was a bright flash and the enemies were killed by means the DM did explain but Chris may have gone to make a cup of tea. The adventurers stared at the corpses of their foes and thought “What the hell was that?!”. Except Birdseye, who stood staring at his hands and thought “Fuck me I’m good!!”
They all healed up and went on their way. Just before they could break out into another showtune they entered a clearing. Linden pissed himself. He literally pissed himself. Before them stood a shit load of hell hounds and minotaurs, the sight of which had caused Linden to wet his pants. He put a brave face on but Birdseye (who would like to make it clear that he definitely hadn’t peed himself) could tell that he had indeed ruined his trousers. They then noticed that the vast majority of the enemies were actually frozen in place and that the remaining enemies would actually be a piece of cake to mop up. They let out a collective sigh of relief and Birdseye said “Thank god I didn’t wet myself! (Unlike Linden)”. Birdseye’s damp trousers caught him off-guard and caused him to come out low on the initiative order…
During the fight many a cut and bruise was sustained by the adventurers and yet… THE NURSE STOOD THERE AND DID NOTHING (so did Sonlin as his powers are fire-based…).
Just as the adventurers finished off the non-frozen enemies the frozen enemies started to shift or something (again, Chris may have gone to make a cup of tea, or maybe at this point he was killing that little spider that he saw on his wall) and they vanished. Then Cyraxis II turned up… but Paul wanted ot go to bed so Cyraxis II had to post his speech to a forum, which is a shame as Birdseye wanted to ask him what happened to the previous 10 Cyraxises. He’ll have to google it later.
And THAT’S how I passed the time waiting for tonight’s episode of FRINGE.